Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvation
Wed Oct 12, 2011 8:19 pm
The wife is currently jetbound on the way to Thailand. I was supposed to go but having transferred to a new position and with my pops to look out for, I had to stay.
It feels like forever since I've had my wife around with me, yet it's been only 5 years. Who knew a person could completely forget how to cook a meal or do a load of laundry in such a short time?
My mom is here, but I can't really stomach her cooking anymore. She asks if I want her to cook, but we both look into each others' eyes and know the answer. She can't cook like Mod. It's all bland and mushy...I may as well eat pig slop.
The upside is that I'll have lots and lots of time for TF2.
Friday, check.
Saturday, check.
Sunday...you know the answer
With meat, fruit and veggies now removed from my diet for a month, I'll make up for it in the only way a man knows how: peanuts and beer.
Can a man function with only junk food as his sustenance? Soon, friends...soon we will find out.
It feels like forever since I've had my wife around with me, yet it's been only 5 years. Who knew a person could completely forget how to cook a meal or do a load of laundry in such a short time?
My mom is here, but I can't really stomach her cooking anymore. She asks if I want her to cook, but we both look into each others' eyes and know the answer. She can't cook like Mod. It's all bland and mushy...I may as well eat pig slop.
The upside is that I'll have lots and lots of time for TF2.
Friday, check.
Saturday, check.
Sunday...you know the answer
With meat, fruit and veggies now removed from my diet for a month, I'll make up for it in the only way a man knows how: peanuts and beer.
Can a man function with only junk food as his sustenance? Soon, friends...soon we will find out.
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Wed Oct 12, 2011 9:01 pm
You can always order in Pizza. Pizza is ALWAYS good and it goes with Beer.
There ARE good Thai restaurants, though I don't know your neck of the woods...
Costco Polish Dogs are ALWAYS good...and at $1.50 and damn good deal.
Buy some Brats at Trader Joe's...boil in beer, then grill...get yourself a good spicy mustard and good kraut and mmmmmmmmmmm.
...and Dude...just cook something for yourself. You HAD to be watching Mod some of the time...and you should be able to recreate some of what she made.
There ARE good Thai restaurants, though I don't know your neck of the woods...
Costco Polish Dogs are ALWAYS good...and at $1.50 and damn good deal.
Buy some Brats at Trader Joe's...boil in beer, then grill...get yourself a good spicy mustard and good kraut and mmmmmmmmmmm.
...and Dude...just cook something for yourself. You HAD to be watching Mod some of the time...and you should be able to recreate some of what she made.
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Wed Oct 12, 2011 9:25 pm
Jinxter wrote:Buy some Brats at Trader Joe's...boil in beer, then grill...get yourself a good spicy mustard and good kraut and mmmmmmmmmmm.
What's this 'boil' you speak of? Is that some sort of gravy or condiment?
Jinxter wrote:...and Dude...just cook something for yourself. You HAD to be watching Mod some of the time...and you should be able to recreate some of what she made.
I took a couple peeks but usually the tv snapped me right back. I know she uses a knife though. And fire, argh!
I think I can figure out the Thai Food though. We're regulars at the restaurant down the street, good one too. Of course that means I'll have to leave the house without getting lost, but hey we all gotta grow up sometime
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Thu Oct 13, 2011 6:50 pm
Did you get married at 18 or something Carl? Didn't you ever learn to make food for yourself!
Cooking is a manly thing to do! Just sear a hunk of meat and then toss in some beer or pepsi, a little vinegar, random spices from the pantry, and you've got yourself an edible hunk of meat with some deep flavor! Feeds 4, or in your case, 1 man for 4 meals!
I'm still single. I have to do this, and I'm lazy about it. I have found the shortcuts to cooking tasty foods!
Cooking is a manly thing to do! Just sear a hunk of meat and then toss in some beer or pepsi, a little vinegar, random spices from the pantry, and you've got yourself an edible hunk of meat with some deep flavor! Feeds 4, or in your case, 1 man for 4 meals!
I'm still single. I have to do this, and I'm lazy about it. I have found the shortcuts to cooking tasty foods!
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Thu Oct 13, 2011 7:01 pm
gel wrote:Did you get married at 18 or something Carl? Didn't you ever learn to make food for yourself!
Cooking is a manly thing to do! Just sear a hunk of meat and then toss in some beer or pepsi, a little vinegar, random spices from the pantry, and you've got yourself an edible hunk of meat with some deep flavor! Feeds 4, or in your case, 1 man for 4 meals!
I'm still single. I have to do this, and I'm lazy about it. I have found the shortcuts to cooking tasty foods!
Oh I lived solo from 20 to 29 or so. But then I married a queen and haven't boiled water since. No more Ramen w/ Egg over the top for me
But now I'm stuck.
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Thu Oct 13, 2011 7:07 pm
lol, you kill me carl!
btw, don't mess around, I've met you, you don't have much "reserves" to fall back on, EAT!
btw, don't mess around, I've met you, you don't have much "reserves" to fall back on, EAT!
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Thu Oct 13, 2011 7:33 pm
I feel your pain Carl.
While everyone else in our major worry's about jobs after college I'm terrified that when I graduate and I no longer have access to the cafeteria food that I'll starve to death. I need a lady fast. Or grad school. I don't think grad schools look highly on, "I just want 'free' food" on application essays though. My ideal post education job is being a trophy husband to some successful lady who doesn't mind taking care of me and only expects me to show up at gala's and fundraisers and such. And we'd have a chef. I can sometimes grill but all meat isn't a rounded diet.
While everyone else in our major worry's about jobs after college I'm terrified that when I graduate and I no longer have access to the cafeteria food that I'll starve to death. I need a lady fast. Or grad school. I don't think grad schools look highly on, "I just want 'free' food" on application essays though. My ideal post education job is being a trophy husband to some successful lady who doesn't mind taking care of me and only expects me to show up at gala's and fundraisers and such. And we'd have a chef. I can sometimes grill but all meat isn't a rounded diet.
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Fri Oct 14, 2011 1:52 pm
I've been big on lazy cooking lately. If you can muster the know-how to boil some water (Youtube it if necessary), bean-based soups have a ridiculously high reward-to-work ratio. 10 minutes to chop up some stuff to throw in the pot with a bag of mixed beans, completely forget about it for 2 hours, and suddenly you have meals for a week.
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Fri Oct 14, 2011 2:53 pm
It could be worse. You could be forced to eat my wife's cooking. Organic everything with a touch of bland. (Ronald Mcdonald is not the devil)
Re: Wife's gone for a month..and so begins my slow starvatio
Fri Oct 14, 2011 3:31 pm
I kill my Doc w/jealousy...Eat whatever I want, and I do...and since I cut back to 1 sugar-free energy drink and 1 reg coke a day, I have been able to maintain at 181 - 185 and by BP averages 118/62, pulse: 62 - 70, with my bad cholesterol low and good cholesterol high. Gotta love good genetics